y i didnt dare to go out alone?

hrm.. well, this entry is for U as you requested.. lol.. more inner feelings de.. haha

From young, i am like a bird kept in cage.. during primary sch days, i was only allowed to step into jurong east central areas wif my frens on the reason to go library.. i seldom go out wif frens and mayb due to my character, i dun like to mix ard.. that's e reason y i dun like to get into a new environment.

i always want to find a few frens, get close to them and stick to them for e rest of my life.. that's it.. this results in my small social circle. yet in my heart, i always wish that i'm a more outgoing, friendly person.. well, i'm contradicting my character.. as a matter of fact,
i hate loneliness.. i simply detest being lonely..

mayb i tend to think too much.. to e extend that normal ppl will not think of.. it's kind of weird at times.. haha...

i have a feeling that 1 person shopping is like very lonely, that feeling is not i want, and i dun like ppl to see me lonely oso.. u can say i'm a mummy's ger.. i like to depend on others juz like leeches. in the past, i depend on my mum, my sis. now i depend on my dear, my sis..

sometimes when i'm alone at home, i will not go out and buy food partially is laziness.. i rather cook or dun eat.. even if i'm out alone, it will only b a short while..

up to e age of dunno wat, shld b sec sch, that was my 1st time ordering fast-food.. i think.. kind of pathetic rite? since young, i seldom tok to guys.. i have a wall, a thick thick inner wall built up in me to shut all men away.. perharps it's due to my upbringing.. den slowly as my age grows, i started to be a little more independent..

Poly life plays a very impt part of my life,

from sem 1 i have sherlyn, weiren, ruoyun, yilun, charlene my IS close pals to teach me to be more outgoing and daring.. drinking beers, staying overnite, sitting by e poolside watching the stars etc.. more to come i really hope. i'm really thankful to all of U(s).. it's really a blessing to have u all to kick the start of my poly life.. juz to let u all noe, i really really treasure our friendship..

from sem 3 onwards, i have my T20 buddies, real playful buddies.. to push me to a well of happiness, enjoyment, crapping etc.. of cuz including rG and ur brother gr.. haha.. i treat u 2 as my T20 buddies.. i juz hope that my friendship will last a long long time.. more chalets to come.. haha

not forgetting a very impt person that really made me into a very very crappy, daring to tok, daring to say cold jokes person, my beloved dear.. thanks to U, my dear..

thanks to all of U.. it's U, U, U... yups, it's U... thanks for all encouragements, and lessons taught about how to be a crappy perosn.. haha..

yups, i'm still learning.. hopefully i will be a more outgoing person.. more individual outings.. cheers..

frenz, buddies give me some ways to counter my "weirdness" haha...